Soaring in the Rain

When training for a race, I like to be prepared for just about anything. I am a planner. It's a part of who I am. Sometimes though, it just doesn't matter. Or maybe, if I'm being honest with myself, it's not possible. That's something I have to learn to let go of. But, why? Why can't things always be perfect on race day?? For growth, Heather! That's what I tell myself. How can I grow as a runner, if I don't learn to go with the flow? There are way too many things that could happen that are definitely out of my control. I'll grow by learning from experiences, rather than beating myself up when my race doesn't go how I planned.

Case in point- I participated in my 6th Soaring Wings Half Marathon yesterday. My good friend, Amy, told me she was going to be running the race also, and asked if we could run together along with two of her friends. This would be a first half marathon for all three of them. I was thrilled to be able to run it with them. Knowing what I know now, I went in overly confident. I badly wanted to be the "experienced" half marathoner who supported and encouraged my friends.

I did all the miles the training plan recommended. I ran hills to prepare for the course. I ran in 100 degree weather and 50 degree weather. I felt ready and I was excited. Then I looked at the forecast. For ten days leading up to race day I watched the low for Friday night (which actually happens around 6am on Saturday) climb each day I looked. The chances of rain also climbed. And then storms were being forecasted. While the temperatures were not freezing as they ended up being at the Little Rock Marathon, I was still having flashbacks to when I did that one and there were rumors flying of the race being cancelled- WHILE the race was still in progress. I started to get anxious that after all our training, this race would be cancelled before it even began. Or we would be somewhere on the course and the officials would tell us we had to stop and take shelter. I was prepared to run in the rain. I LOVE running in the rain. I just prayed any storms would hold off until the afternoon.

The morning of the race arrived and despite the forecast for 100% chance of rain, you could feel the excitement buzzing in the air. Based on our training, Amy and her two friends, Dawn and Kayla, and Scott and I placed ourselves in between the 2:05 and the 2:10 pacers. We were only waiting a few minutes before the director of Soaring Wings Ranch said a prayer, and then the Star Spangled Banner was sang. We were in the second wave to start and it came quickly. There was a light, hardly there, drizzle that disappeared within the first mile. We kept with the 2:05 pacer for about a mile and then we passed him. It always feels good when you can pass a pacer. :) Dawn and Kayla were a little ahead of Amy, Scott, and me. I had a feeling they were going to stay that way. I was happy they felt good enough to keep ahead.
For the first couple miles I kept waiting for the settling in to happen. Usually it takes me about 2 miles to get my breathing right and feel comfortable in a pace. It never really happened though. The air was so thick from the humidity. The forecasted rain seemed to be just sitting in the air. I found it hard to breath. So hard that somewhere in the 4th mile I had to stop running and try and catch my breath. Only I got so frustrated that I got worked up, which in turn made it even harder to breath. And that just made me more frustrated. It was a stupid, vicious, circle. I took a couple minutes to calm down and then started running again. Amy was ahead of Scott and I now. I knew she didn't want to walk. She said she would slow down her pace if needed, but she didn't want to walk. So we caught up to her and when she asked if I was ok, I got upset again. All I wanted was to be HER encourager. Like I said earlier, I was overly confident. However, I love that Amy was the one to encourage me! Over the next almost 9 miles I had to walk much more than I wanted in order to make sure I didn't lose control again. Dawn and Kayla were far ahead and I knew Amy could be with them, but instead she stayed with Scott and I, slowing down her pace anytime I walked, but never walking herself. Every time I apologized she told me she never cared about her finishing time, only that she finished without walking. Scott was also so patient with me. I'm positive he could have PR'd this year, but he chose to stay with Amy and me through the whole race.
Every once in a while the moisture in the air would turn to actual rain and it gave me hope that I could breath better and maybe finish strong. In the last mile it almost did. There was only a little over half a mile left and I had a short walk. I hate walking with so little to go, but I was still having a hard time breathing and I really wanted to finish without feeling like my throat was closing up. We could hear the finisher's names being called. We were so close. I heard Scott telling Amy about the finish line. "There it is!" I heard him say to her. I made sure to stay with Amy. I wanted to walk so bad. And then we turned the final turn. We picked up the pace a little. I saw Amy's husband and kids along the side of the finisher's chute. I was so thrilled for her that they had made it to see her finish. It fueled me. And just like always I got a final burst of adrenaline. As the rain really started coming down Amy, Scott, and I flew across the finish line at exactly the same time!

Our official finishing time was 2:18:15, with an average pace of 10:33. That may be my second "slowest" time (next to my first half marathon time of 2:19:20), but I'm still proud of myself. It's not a slow time at all, and beyond that, we still placed close to the top third of all the half marathon participants. I think that's pretty stinkin' awesome!

I hugged Amy and high fived Dawn and Kayla who were waiting at the finish line (huge thanks to them for catching a great finish line picture of us!). They finished in 2:04:17! All three of them did amazing!

So what did I learn? I need to LET IT GO! I'm a control freak planner that needs to stop beating myself up over things I can't control. Like humidity that causes me to not be able to breath. It's so hard, but next time, whenever that may be, I'm going to remember my race yesterday and remind myself that I am not the one that is in control. I'm tempted to sign up for another race that happens soon just to prove to myself that I can do that. Oh wait... That's me still trying to control things, isn't it? :)

Until next time...